The piano man is tuning our piano today. One hand holds the tuner while the other hits the key. His head tilts towards the piano as the sound waves enter his ears. Those ears are trained to hear when a note is not in tune. His ears can hear things that my ears cannot. Why? Because of years of practice.
God is using people to tune my life. They see and hear things that I cannot. They pray for me and give counsel. I listen and trust that God is speaking through them.
I am thankful for the numerous godly people God has put into my life who counsel and advise me. Yet there are times that I feel overwhelmed and confused by all the advice that is shared. The many voices and opinions swirl around my brain like a hurricane.
Where is God in this storm? Where is God when my emotions quake? How can I hear the voice of my Maker in this whirlwind of noise?
I have been reading about Elijah recently. Following his mighty victory over the prophets of Baal, Elijah sinks into the pit of depression. Fleeing from the vengeful, wicked queen Jezebel, Elijah seeks refuge in the desert. While sitting under a broom tree, Elijah prays, “I have had enough, Lord. Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.”
While typing this blog, the words: “I have had enough. . . . I am no better than my ancestors” stands out. Looking at my life, I see patterns that are similar to my mother, and this disturbs me. For so much of my life, I have determined to NOT be like her. Consumed by fear, she tried to control me. As I step back and view my life, this same pattern is at work in me. I, too, am no better than my ancestors.
How can you try so hard not to be like someone and yet end up following into the same ditch?
God calls to me in the midst of my shame. “What are you doing here, Tina?”
Lord, I am in a pit and I don’t know how to get out. I am trying everything I can think of: counseling, praying, being anointed, reading, writing. . . What else am I supposed to do?
As I think about this, I am reminded of the verse:
“Be still and know that I am God.”
Elijah waited to hear from God. First God sent a “powerful wind that tore apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.” (I Kings 19)
Whisper Your truth to me, God. I am listening.
Prayer
Good Morning Father God,
I am having a hard time accepting Your “tuning” process in my life. There are numerous things that are out of tune. You long to bring harmony to our family. You desire for our family to make beautiful music together by the way we love each other. Yet I tend to be quite sharp with my words and harsh in tone. Sometimes I just want to do my own thing and not pay attention to your steady directions. Like a rogue musician who ignores the conductor, I am determined to sing at my own tempo, in my own key, using my own words for my own glory.
In Your Time
In Your key
With Your words
For Your glory
I choose to lay aside my plans for Your will. I ask that Your Holy Spirit would fill every part of this rebellious heart and do His healing work in my soul.
Thank you for reading my blog and praying for our family.
healinghope4women 